A Soldier No More
by Tapioka
Summary: It's five months after the last war and Heero's realizing that he's sick of living life as the perfect soldier. Chapter One: Relena is worried about her beloved bodyguard and all Heero wants to do is lay in his nice, comfy bed....


Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Wing. Sad, but true

A/N: I haven't written fanfiction for at least three years. Let's see how this turns out, shall we?

"A Soldier No More"

By Tapioka

Chapter One

"What's wrong with Heero?"

Heero had been in a deep sleep when his alarm clock went off at 6:30 in the morning, as it did everyday. He grunted and slammed the sleep button down, not even opening his eyes. He did NOT want to get up this morning. The soft billowy pillows and down comforter were just too damn comfortable right now...

"Heeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeero!" Relena's voice came from the hallway and there was a loud knocking on his bedroom door. Heero grunted in response, and buried his face in the pillow.

"Just 10 more minutes" he mumbled into the pillow. The knocking continued and Heero picked the pillow up and plopped it on top of his head. 'I just want to sleep...'

"Heero, get up!" Relena knocked a little harder, and after a couple more minutes of no response from inside Heero's room, Relena sighed. "Heero! You get up this instant or I'll...I'll...I'll break this door down!"

Heero couldn't help but chuckle at that. Relena? Break the door down? The girl couldn't open a can of soda without worrying that she'd break a nail. Heero stayed under his pillow and waited for Relena's attempt to break into his room. He didn't hear the sound of the door crashing into his room and figured that Relena had decided not to risk breaking a heel and had given up. He was about to settle back into blissful slumber when the pillow was yanked off his head.

"Heero Yuy, you get up this instant!"

Heero lifted his head and saw Relena standing over him, not looking too happy. "How did you get in here?" Heero was sure he had locked the door last night. He always did.

Relena held up a key. "I have the master key to every room in this estate. Now get up! My shuttle leaves in half an hour and it takes at least 15 minutes to get to the shuttle station! Did you forget about my meeting with President Nevum?"

Heero jumped out of bed. How could he have forgotten? He quickly grabbed some clothes and headed towards the bathroom. Relena shook her head at her bodyguard and frowned. It was very unlike Heero to forget such things. "I'll be waiting downstairs."

Heero got dressed and brushed his teeth and hair in record time, cursing at himself while he grabbed his gun, cell phone, and beeper and rushed out the door. The bed was calling his name as he rushed past it, but Heero shook his head to clear away the thoughts of flopping back down in it's comfort. There was no way he would be able to spend all day in bed. Heero Yuy, the Perfect Soldier, did not need to lay in bed. He had a job to do, and that job was to protect Relena, just as he has everyday for the past five months. He couldn't deny it though, if he had to choose between doing his job as protector of the Ex-Queen of the World, and lying in bed all day, he was beginning to wish he could choose the latter.

* * *

Heero watched Relena as she stirred her tea absent mindedly, staring out the window with a frown on her face. This morning's meeting with President Nevum of the Colonies had not gone well, and he knew that Relena was worried about the future of the alliance between the colonies and Earth. Heero sighed and leaned back in his seat and stared out the window as well.

Five months ago the Earth and colonies had finally achieved peace. Heero and his fellow gundam pilots were finally able to say farewell to their gundams, and get on with their lives. Quatre went home to take over his father's position as head of the Winner Estate. Trowa returned to the circus, and Wufei joined the Preventors. Duo...well...no one was quite sure what he had been up to, all though he still e-mailed or called every once and while. The last Heero had heard from him was that he was moving in with Hilde.

Heero had moved in with Relena, and had taken up the job as her body guard. In the beginning, he did it mostly because he thought he was in love with her. As the months went on, Heero realized that even though he really cared for the blond, he wasn't in love with her. He knew Relena's feelings for him and didn't know how he was going to break it to her that he didn't love her back, and that he only thought of her as a friend.

In the past couple of months Heero had begun to realize other things as well. He thought he would have adapted well to being a body guard. It was something he was used to; protecting people. He was a soldier and a fighter. Relena told him he was 'stoic and heroic'. He thought of it as his duty to protect her, someone whom the world loved so much. He couldn't let the people, or Relena down. Lately though, Heero was beginning to dread waking up. His days had become monotonous. Wake up, eat breakfast with Relena, follow her around to meetings. Check his laptop for any important government information or news from the current talks between the colonies and Earth. Follow Relena around some more. In his free time he was left alone with his thoughts. His memories of the wars and the deaths were always there. They were inescapable. And the truth was, Heero was beginning to get sick of it all.

"Heero?"

Heero turned away from the window and saw Relena looking at him, a concerned look on her face. "What?"

"Are you alright?" Relena asked.

"I'm fine. Why?"

"Well, you just looked like something you were thinking about was troubling you, that's all. Do you want to talk about it?" Relena set her tea cup down and folded her hands in her lap.

Heero sighed inwardly. 'How about I'm sick of sitting through meetings and listening to talk of politics and possible war and all I want to do is get away from it all'. "No, I'm fine. I'm just tired." .

"Okay, well, if you ever want to talk..." Relena placed leaned forward and placed a hand on his.

"Hn." Heero returned to looking at the window. Relena sighed and removed her hand, and stared at Heero for a bit. She knew there was something bothering him, she just had no idea what.

* * *

"Hi Relena!" Hilde's cheerful face appeared on Relena's video-phone sitting on top of her desk and was smiling brightly. "It's so good to hear from you!"

Relena smiled at her best friend. "Hi Hilde, how are you? How is Duo?"

Hilde rolled her eyes. "I'm fine. Duo's questionable. He's been nothing but trouble since he's moved in. Can't hold a steady job, doesn't clean up after himself..."

Relena laughed. "I'm sure he has been quite a handful."

"That being the understatement of the century. So, how about you Relena? How have you been?"

"I have been doing quite well, really. It's Heero I'm worried about."

Hilde noticed Relena's face drop. "Oh Relena, what's wrong? Has something happened?"

"No. Well, I don't know. He hasn't been himself lately."

"How so?"

Relena leaned back in her chair. "He's been very quiet lately, you know, keeping to himself most of the time."

Hilde laughed. "Sounds like Heero to me, Relena."

"Well, I mean, even more so. And lately he has been looking so...I don't know...depressed."

"Well, have you asked him about it?"

"Yes, but he always says he's fine. I think something is really wrong though. He's been waking up late. And sometimes when I talk to him he isn't paying attention. He just hasn't seem focused."

"Heero? Not focused?" Hilde seemed a little surprised. "Wow, sounds serious."

"Yes, I know. I'm very worried, Hilde. I don't know what to do." Relena leaned forward and rested her chin in her hand. "I am afraid that maybe it might be me."

"Oh Relena, I doubt that. Heero cares about you, doesn't he?"

"Well...I'm not sure. He's been so distant these past few weeks. I'm not sure how he feels about me right now." Relena felt a tear slide down her cheek.

"Relena, maybe you need to try talking to him again. Otherwise, I'm not sure what you should do."

"Yeah, I think I will." Relena wiped away the tear. "Thanks for listening, Hilde."

"No problem, Relena. If you need me, just call."

"I will. Bye Hilde."

"Bye hun."

Relena closed her vid-phone and leaned back in her chair. She didn't know what to do about Heero. She wanted to talk to him, but she knew he most likely wouldn't want to. She frowned and pressed the intercom system to his room. Might as well try again. "Heero?"

The intercom buzzed for a second and then she heard the beep as Heero answered from his room. "Yes?"

"Would you like to have dinner with me tonight? I thought that since it was such a nice evening we could eat on the patio. Around six?"

There was silence for a couple of minutes and then another beep. "Um...actually...actually I have a lot of work to do tonight."

Relena frowned at the intercom. "Okay" She sighed. "That's alright. If you have a lot of work to do, don't let me interrupt." She stood there waiting for a response, but Heero said nothing more. Sighing for the hundredth time that day, she flopped back down in her chair.

* * *

"DUO!"

Hilde stood tapping her foot in the living room. Comic books and beer cans were all over the couch, and the coffee table was covered in pizza boxes and more beer cans. Hilde should have known not to have bothered cleaning before she left for the weekend. "DUO MAXWELL!"

There was some clanking in the kitchen and a few swear words, and then Duo hopped out holding his left foot in his hand, grimacing. "Stupid pot!" He hopped over the couch, his long chestnut braid bouncing behind him, and sat on top of the comic books and beer cans. He rubbed his foot and looked up at Hilde. "You called?"

"Duo, look at this mess. I cleaned the house before I left and now look at it. It's disgusting!" Hilde pointed at the garbage on top of the coffee table. "There's a garbage can in this house for a reason!"

Duo gave Hilde his puppy dog eyes. "Aw, come on now Hil, is that any way to greet me when you just got home? Besides...it's not _that _bad."

"Yeah, sure, if you don't mind living in a dumpster." Hilde pushed some of the mess off of the lazy boy chair and sat down. "Anyway, I have a favor to ask of you."

"Geez, you just get home and you already want something from me? Does it involve the bedroom and handcuffs?" Duo smirked at Hilde who just rolled her eyes.

"No Duo, and nothing I ask of you will ever include handcuffs or the bedroom. After you clean this mess up I need you to call Heero for me. Well, actually it's for Relena."

"Why do I need to call Heero? Can't Relena call him herself?"

"Relena thinks there's something up with Heero, but he won't tell her. She called me when I was on my way home and said that Heero hasn't been himself lately. And since you've been his best friend and all, I was thinking that maybe..."

" I could drag something out of him?" Duo raised an eyebrow at Hilde. "Please, no one can drag anything out of that zombie. He's like talking to a wall. Except for the occasional grunt."

"Come on Duo, he's talked to you before, hasn't he?"

"Well, yeah, but that was a while ago."

"Please Duo, just try. For Relena?" Hilde pleaded. "If you call Heero and talk to him, I'll do the vacuuming. You'll just have to put away the garbage."

Duo really hated vacuuming. He thought about it for a minute and then nodded. "Fine, I'll do it."

"Great! Thanks Duo!" Hilde popped up and gave Duo a hug and then headed towards the kitchen.

"Um, Hilde?" Duo called after her. "If you thought the living room was a mess than you might not want to-"

"DUOOOOOOO!"

* * *

Heero lay spread eagle on his bed. He had told Relena he had work to do, but the truth was, he didn't have any work to do. The head of security had asked him if he wanted to go over the new security system, but Heero had told him he'd do it tomorrow. He felt bad for lying to Relena, and she sounded disappointed when he turned down her dinner invitation, but Heero really like eating dinner with her. He knew she want to talk about what was wrong with him, and he didn't want to tell her the truth.

'The truth is, I just want to leave...'

The phone rang next to his bed and sat up and stared at it for a while. Did he want to answer it? It rang a couple more times before Heero decided he might as well. He flipped the little screen up and was surprised to see Duo's face.

"Hey, long time no see, my friend."

"Hi Duo." Heero got up and sat at his desk.

"How's it going Heero?"

"Fine."

"Good, good." Duo twiddled his thumbs for a bit before speaking again. "I'm good too, in case you were wondering. "

"Hn."

"So uh...how's Relena?"

"Good..."

"You two still shackin' it up?" Duo smirked at Heero.

"We're not shacking it up, Duo. I'm her bodyguard, it's important that I'm here 24/7 in order to protect her." Heero glared at the video screen.

"Whatever dude. How are things with Relena anyway? Getting married anytime soon?"

"No."

"Why not? You two are still together, aren't you?" Duo asked.

The last thing Heero wanted was to get quizzed on his relationship with Relena right now. "We were never together. At least not like that. We're just...friends."

"Oh. Do you want to be more than friends?"

"No, I care about her, but not romantically." Heero paused. "Duo, why are asking me all these questions about Relena?"

Duo shrugged. "Just wondering, I guess. So um, you said you're doing fine. Just...fine?"

"Yes."

"Oh. Okay." There was silence for a while. "So um...how's work?"

Heero was beginning to get the feeling that Duo called for a reason other then just to catch up. "Duo, why did you call?"

"Hey! Can't a guy call his best bud to catch up?" Duo pretended to look hurt.

"Duo..."

"Okay, okay, fine. Relena called Hilde earlier today and said that you'd been acting funny, so I've been assigned the task of finding out what's bothering you. So um, what's bothering you?"

Heero sighed again. Great, now everyone's thinking that he's been acting weird. Just what he needed. "I'm fine Duo."

"That's not Relena said. She said you've been unfocused and kind of a space case lately."

"Relena called me a space case?" Heero highly doubted Relena said that.

"Well...no...she didn't say 'space case' exactly, but she did say you've been kind of out there lately."

"I've just been tired. I work late sometimes, I guess it's finally catching up to me." Heero lied.

"Oh..." Duo seemed to be thinking for a minute. "You sure? I mean, if there's something up, you know you can tell me."

Heero didn't say anything for a while. Would Duo understand? Probably not. He may be his best friend, but even Duo didn't know what really went on inside Heero's mind. He was pretty sure that Duo still thought that Heero was still the same person he was during the war. The emotionless, stone wall. The indestructible gundam pilot that would kill anyone that got in the way of his missions. In a way, Heero supposed he was still that same person...but he had still changed some.

"Heero? You okay bud?" Duo asked after a few minutes of silence. Heero snapped back to attention.

"Hey...Duo..." Should he tell Duo what was bothering him? That he hated his life right now and just wanted to get away from it?

"Yeah?"

Duo was looking at him, waiting for him to say something. Heero paused. 'Nah, he wouldn't understand. He's been doing fine since the war ended. He'd probably think I'm weak.' "Nevermind. I should get back to work."

"Okay man. Well, if you ever feel like talking...you know how to reach me."

Heero just nodded at the screen and then turned the video-phone off. He sat back in his chair. He thought that maybe he should have told Duo what was bothering him, but he shook his head no at himself. Duo would just laugh and tell him to do something about it then.

Maybe he would do something about it...

* * *

A/N: Hmm...turned out okay I guess. I hate the first chapter, it's always hard for me to get the story going. Anyway, what happens next? Stay tuned, dear readers! And drop a review and tell me if I suck or not! 


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